Rewatching The Sopranos S2 E3 "Toodle-F**king-Oo"

Family Events: A friendly police officer informs Tony of an underage party at Livia's house. When he arrives, Meadow, Hunter, and others are drunk while another young man is carried out of the house on a gurney into an ambulance, having overdosed on X. Tony and Carmela discuss how best to punish Meadow for the party but feel powerless in knowing their words and actions mean very little to her. When confronted the next day, Meadow feigns regret over the situation and suggests her punishment should involve losing her credit card. Janice initially supports Meadow's independence but changes her mind after seeing the condition of Livia's house. She angrily confronts Tony and Carmela while Meadow listens from upstairs. Later Carmela apologizes to Janice and emphasizes the importance of family. When Tony returns to Livia's house to have the locks changed, he finds Meadow inside, cleaning up the mess.

Mafia Events: Richie Aprile is released from prison; his first move as a free man is to severely assault Paul "Beansie" Gaeta at his pizza parlor. Richie's reunion with Tony is happy but Christopher is humiliated when Richie calls out his domestic abuse of Adriana, Richie's niece. Tony agrees that Chris should heed Richie's warning but then refuses to discuss any further business with him and abruptly leaves. 

Later Tony agrees to discuss business at a mall, but offers little support to Richie, who feels disrespected by Tony's avoidant manner. In his betrayal, Richie goes to Junior and offers his allegiance. At a homecoming party for Richie at Bada Bing, Chris comments on Richie's hostile attitude; Tony assures him things will be alright. That night, Richie returns to Beansie's place and assaults him again, worse, this time striking him multiple times with his car. Tony visits Beansie in the hospital, becomes disturbed by his condition, and then angrily confronts Richie at the mall again. Richie feels his actions were justified.

Mental Health Events: Melfi is at an Italian restaurant with friends when she runs into Tony eating with his crew. She is tipsy from wine and behaves in a silly, flirtatious way, prompting the crew's assumption that she and Tony have a sexual history. While Tony entertains these notions, he is uncomfortable seeing Melfi as she previously refused to continue therapy with him. In her own therapy, Melfi discusses having shown Tony the girlish side of herself due to the guilt she felt over abandoning him as a patient. Later in a dream, she drives by the aftermath of a car accident, where Tony has had a panic attack and crashed, killing himself to the accompaniment of a Wizard of Oz instrumental.

Significant Ideology: Tony's powers of intimidation, while effective among the members of his crew, have no effect on the women of his family. He rarely loses his temper with Carmela, more in her presence but never threateningly, and both Janice and Meadow do not give a single fuck, even when he tries to specifically be threatening. Carmela continues to model positive conflict resolution, apologizing to Janice in a healthy way after their disagreement, and standing up for her beliefs (she won't throw Janice out as "it's not Christian") in front of her children. This is interesting in considering how Meadow eventually accepts responsibility for what happened to Livia's house. Meadow's actions were likely influenced by Carmela's morality and Janice's expressed disapproval, although part of her may have been onto the fact that Janice, if allowed to stay in their house, would continue to have a front-row seat to any further bullshit Meadow might get herself up to. In this way, Meadow ensures Janice will have a place to go, away from her. However, Meadow took pride in her ability to manipulate Tony and Carmela multiple times, and just before Tony observes her cleaning, had left another mess in the kitchen of her own house, making cocoas and grilled cheese sandwiches with Hunter. The writing choices showing Meadow as reckless, cunning, unapologetic, disrespectful, and finally, remorseful and accepting of blame are realistic; teenagers do all these things, and this is typical of normal adolescent development (albeit more so in teenagers who have support at home and who are accustomed to getting the majority of their needs met). The confusion between Tony and Carmela in navigating how to punish Meadow along with Tony's surprise at the end indicates a situation many parents find themselves in when dealing with their children at this age----they don't know enough about the developmental process to understand that Meadow's actions are appropriate for her age and start to panic as their control slips away. Janice, who has not raised children, has learned this somehow, but her empathy for Meadow's quest for individualization ends once it affects her, personally. Janice and Tony were likely punished physically as children; conversations suggest that they were both into sexual and criminal events as teenagers. Carmela's upbringing, in contrast, seems to have been very different, as evidenced by her patience, ability to apologize and forgive, and conflict resolution skills. 

Richie's calculated and unapologetic violence is disturbing, as is his strategic target of each member of Tony's family. His cool, detached manner gives the impression of a very snake-like personality yet at times, his affect is mismatched for the many of the occasions throughout the episode. His smiles toward Tony and even Janice seem faked, while his gleeful expressions while torturing Beansie are much more genuine. He seems shocked at Tony's adherence to speaking in safe areas, and mentions "old school" in reference to himself several times. Ten years is a long time to be in jail; Richie has missed the entirety of the 90s and doesn't seem to understand how much everything has changed. He seems not only to be a sociopath but a very comfortable one, begging the question of how many guys in the crew hold the same values. Tony has clearly been socialized to more emotionally-focused culture due to his wife, who seems to be an emotionally healthy person, his children, who he loves, and now, therapy with Melfi. Richie definitely seems at odds with this, both fundamentally and personally (is he jealous of Tony?)

Melfi's focus on Tony as an element of her own mental health is significant. She was justified in protecting her own safety in terminating therapy with him, yet feels guilty for having done so. What is not explored in her own therapy is her flirtatious reaction toward Tony in context. She happened across him on what was solidly his turf---upscale Italian restaurant, mafia crew occupying the house's best seating, and Tony, the boss, at the head of the table. This happened once before, in the pilot episode, where Melfi had just recently met Tony and maintained his confidentiality by keeping their conversation (which he initiated) short and surface-level, but this time was different. They are no longer in a therapeutic relationship, which was her choice, so there is no issue with their talking in public, but Melfi initiated this time, and prolonged the conversation. With her guard somewhat lessened due to her wine consumption, was she acting upon feelings of attraction that had existed throughout Tony's therapy (drunk actions = sober wishes?) She denounced them the next day in therapy, and they didn't discuss her feelings in the context of the therapeutic relationship (Eliot validates her actions as a woman and a doctor but does not get into countertransference in terms of attraction), but now, after all this, she's dreaming about him, too.

Italian Language: Cazzis ("that's none of your fucking cazzis"); closest translation = "Non sono cazzi tuoi," which is "none of your business."

"Oofah, Ma, state zitt'" (After Livia launches into "I wish the Lord would take me") = "shut up."

Rewatching The Sopranos S2 E1 "Guy Walks Into a Psychiatrist's Office"

Family Events: Oldest sister Janice Soprano shows up, when she asks about Livia, Tony says, "she's dead to me" and that he's selling her house. Meadow visits Livia in the hospital; Livia gives her two of her own grandmother's rings so that she won't be forgotten. Tony arranges a house party for Janice and their other younger sister, Barbara. When he finds the "for sale" sign for Livia's house hidden in Janice's car, Tony rages to Carmela about Janice's intentions.

Mafia Events: Junior's "Boss" standing in the FBI's photo lineup is downgraded; Tony's picture remains in its place but is relabeled "Street Boss." Pussy returns, surprising Tony as he gets his morning newspaper. He admits to Tony he knew they all suspected he was the rat but that he had been away for his back problems in Puerto Rico. Tony forgives him but pats down his body to check for a wire. 

Junior's guy, Philly Parisi, is assassinated, apparently for being "a bigmouth fuck," and spreading rumors about Tony's treatment of Livia and seeing a female psychiatrist. Christopher is given a SEC compliance officer role in a brokerage office; two younger guys he brings in use physical threats to force everyone to push "Webistics" stock.

Mental Health Events: Tony crashes into a telephone pole when he has a panic attack; he sees a new male therapist who refuses to treat him for more than a single session. Tony continues to have issues with controlling his anger over Janice's actions and seems to struggle with further panic symptoms during the party at his house. Eventually he surprises Melfi, who is not receptive to seeing him. He attempts to discuss his recent panic attacks with her but she refuses to talk to him about it or anything else. She snaps, "How many more people need to die for your personal growth?" 

That was a different time for us.

Significant Ideology: The passage of time is shown in both the beginning of the episode (the montage of everyone going about their activities to Sinatra's "It Was a Very Good Year,") as well as the end (acknowledged through a cover of The Rolling Stones' "Time is on My Side"). Changes in Tony's life are part of the importance of the passage of time, including his fallout with Livia, professional breakup with Melfi, concerns over Junior in prison, Christopher launching off on his own as a broker, and Pussy's possible involvement with the feds. The one constant, reliable figure in his life throughout these changes is Carmela. Her montage footage was wholly focused around the delivery of lasagna from oven to table, just as she closes the episode by presenting Tony with a bowl of spaghetti after he comes home confused and upset from being rejected by Melfi. She helps Tony regulate his emotions over Livia's house and Janice's meddling and encourages him to find pleasure in being with his friends. Knowing Melfi had been helpful to him in the past, Carmela insists Tony resume therapy, citing among other reasons that they have not had sex in "God knows how long." 

Though there have been no such scenes between Carmela and Tony, Tony has what is assumed to be frequent relations with his goomar, Irina. Without reading too much into what has been shown thus far, (Tony admits to offering Carmela oral sex only once a year on her birthday, Tony does not do much other than lie there with Irina, Tony has had sexual fantasies about Melfi) it seems as though there might be specific expectations for his relations with Carmela that either don't come easily to him (emotion, genuineness, consideration for her needs) or that he just doesn't make the time for when he can use Irina for his own needs without any further provisions. Carmela wants him, physically, and is doing everything else she can to manage the house, the kids, and feeding everyone, but Tony seems to need her nurturing more than anything else. Carmela's mother in criticizing Livia (and it seems her own daughter's marriage) reminds her that Livia told her on their wedding night that marrying Tony was a mistake, that he'd only get bored with her; whatever he is currently, bored or something else, he needs Carmela more than ever. In some scenes, ("you mope your way through this and I will cut your throat," and he LISTENS TO HER) she actually seems to wield more power than anyone.

WILL YOU STOP, PLEASE?

Tony tells Janice that a doctor told him Livia's "stroke" was actually a conversion reaction; this is a mental health disorder and would typically prompt treatment from a psychologist. Surprise, Livia should be in therapy! 

Chris hits Adriana in the club (as in, full public with onlookers) in front of his two broker associates. For this and various other reasons, Christopher could also benefit from some psychological help.

Italian Language: Batiamo le mani - I kiss the hand; my respects (when the crew explains to Pussy that Tony arranged his pickups while he was away). 

Schifosa (you fucking) unsatisfactory/trashy re: Silvio's performance of Kay Adams asking Michael Corleone "is it true, Michael?"

Streg (re Livia, she's the devil, said to Janice) strega, witch

Rewatching the Sopranos S1 E13 "I Dream of Jeanne Cusamano"

I am waiting (38 minutes so far) on the phone, on hold with SSA and decided to do what I always do when I'm bored, which is to read my old blogs.  I haven't written anything recently because I've been drowning in school stuff, and when I'm not doing that I'm catching up on everyone else's needs that have gone neglected while I was doing school stuff. Summer has been slightly less demanding so I can read and watch tv again. 

I spent 56 minutes on hold waiting to talk to these idiots for someone to tell me I can't make an appointment for what I need and have to WALK IN. 

FML.

Family Events: Livia shows up at Tony's house not oriented in reality and yells at Meadow and a police officer. After she is transferred to the nursing unit at Green Grove for Alzheimer's care, she upsets visitor Artie Bucco by suggesting Tony was the one who set fire to the old Vesuvio. Artie shows up at Satriale's and threatens Tony with a rifle. Tony manages to talk him down; Artie responds by bashing his rifle apart and driving off.

Tony goes to confront Livia at Green Grove where he is informed she has had a stroke. As Livia is wheeled away in a gurney she smiles as Tony threatens her. Tony takes the family to Vesuvio in the middle of a terrible storm and toasts them, telling them to remember the little moments that were good. 

Mafia Events: Junior gives permission for Tony's crew to whack Jimmy; Christopher lures Jimmy to a hotel where Silvio kills him. His body is later recovered outside a dumpster with a rat stuffed in his mouth. Tony later meets with the feds where they play him recordings of Livia and Junior discussing Livia's anger at being forced to live at Green Grove, Tony's depression and psychiatric treatment, and Tony's crew using Green Grove for cover. Tony informs his crew that Junior and Mikey were the ones who arranged to have him killed. Tony kills Junior's assassin; Silvio helps him take care of the body. Paulie and Christopher come upon Mikey during his morning run, chase him through the forest, and kill him. Junior, Larry-Boy Barise, Joe Sasso, and 13 others get arrested for federal racketeering. Under examination with a federal agent, Junior refuses to cut a deal to save himself, scoffing at the idea that Tony is the actual boss of the family. 

Tony comes clean to his crew about seeing a psychiatrist, Silvio and Paulie are supportive, Christopher appears confused and upset about it. Later Paulie admits to Silvio that he can't get past Tony choosing a woman psychiatrist.

Mental Health Events: Melfi challenges Tony's reluctance to consider Livia's responsibility for the attack on his life, referencing the sudden memory loss and his subconscious creation of Isabella. Tony is incredulous."What are you saying, that my own mother tried to have me whacked for putting her in a nursing home?" Melfi explains that usually patients are encouraged to make their own breakthroughs in therapy, but that she is willing to help him through to some conclusions because his life is in danger. As Tony becomes increasingly physically agitated, Melfi goes on to suggest that Livia may have borderline personality disorder, reading diagnostic criteria from the DSM 4. Tony reacts by charging Melfi, flipping the glass top off the coffee table, shattering it, and threatening her. He shows up to his next session, admits Melfi was right about his mother, and tells her she needs to leave town. 

Religious Events:

Father Phil happens upon Carmela and Rosalie Aprile at Vesuvio; Carmela is disturbed to discover that Rosalie has given him Jackie's expensive watch. Later Carmela shows up at church with dinner for Father Phil and sees him eating with Rosalie so she dumps her own pasta into the garbage. Carmela is bothered by Father Phil's familiarity in showing up at her home and using her video store account, eventually confronting him for his hypocrisy when he questions Tony's faith and actions. Carmela suggests that instead of criticizing Tony, he look at his own manipulation. 

Father Phil also seems to be making a play to encourage Artie Bucco to report Tony's possible involvement with the restaurant fire and appears to be disappointed when Artie declines to take his advice. 

Significant Ideology

They took a little bit of a liberty in stretching out the borderline personality disorder (BPD) diagnostic criteria, probably to fit the version of Livia they'd already spent so much time laying out, but saying flat out that sufferers of BPD aren't able to form interpersonal relationships at all and that their internal phobias are all that matter to them is very negative and in many cases, off the mark. For Livia, (who Melfi is not treating so she has really no business diagnosing), these descriptions sound accurate, at least at first, but to qualify for BPD one needs at least five out of nine criteria, and Livia has formed and continues to form interpersonal relationships outside her immediate family, and her internal phobias (driving, being abandoned) aren't really phobias but relevant concerns as she recently had a car accident, injuring a friend, and was literally placed in a nursing home! If anything, Livia might qualify for histrionic personality disorder, dependent personality disorder, or maybe even an unspecified one before borderline, but whatever. She might not even be out of the ballpark for antisocial personality disorder, considering how easily she arranged her own son's assassination and her strange smile at Tony after her "stroke," but that's a kind of a reach. 

Whatever diagnosis ends up fitting best, Livia's mental health continues to be an important factor in this story. That said, any practitioner should have been able to clearly read Tony's escalating body language and anxiety cues as these descriptions were applied to Livia, thus avoiding the table flip and physical threat. Tony's inability to consider this information cognitively (your mother arranged to have you killed and is now faking dementia to get out of it) and uncontrolled physical anger suggests that despite several months of therapy, he cannot process unpleasant information through his executive functioning, only by reacting with his body. Coupling this (Tony still has so much work to do) with the scene of him in Melfi's abandoned office after she has left is a very serious situation. He is literally in the dark without her.

Some of the most emotional moments in this episode come in reactions: 

Agent Harris's reaction to his boss dangling the tape of Livia and Junior in front of Tony---he knows what's on the recordings and he knows what hearing them will do to Tony . . . (suggesting Harris, while still committed to doing his job as a federal agent, has grown to like Tony, or at the least, empathizes with him learning his mother and uncle have conspired against him).

Tony's reaction to hearing what he hears on the tape, hurt, anger, then immediate regrouped control as he nods to the fed that he wants to hear more . . .  He just finished losing control with Melfi and perhaps felt bad about it afterward but manages to keep his cool with the feds. In a way, Melfi's warning prepared Tony. Having that information prompt such a violent response with her proves that it bothered him, likely because he found it plausible, painful as it is. Melfi being a woman might be a factor; her proximity to Carmela and Livia or women in general would have been accepted as trustworthy---who knows an Italian woman better than another Italian woman?---but also perhaps emasculating. Tony can't escape the news Melfi gives him by any sort of strategic business or mafia means so he rages, physically and threatens her; when the feds confirm Melfi's theory, he has no choice but to play it cool and plan his retaliation, faced with the realization that Melfi saw it coming and was taking a risk in telling him the truth. His showing up at her office afterward suggests he might be looking for absolution.

Carmela's response to hearing the news about Livia: "I could kill her . . . with THESE HANDS!" and later, "This wasn't you. It was HER." Yet putting on a completely believable pleasant act when Livia and Junior come for dinner. Tony may be the one in therapy but Carmela seems to be learning a lot about boundaries (Father Phil), emotional regulation, and strategizing. 

When Tony explains to Carmela that cunnilingus and psychiatry brought them to this, he connected the issues with Junior and the mafia at large to what Silvio earlier said to the crew about needing therapy. "It'd be better to admit to ourselves that these are painful, stressful times." He looks around to see no one willing to agree with him and then says, "But it'll never fucking happen." These men are in a business that requires them to commit many unpleasant, upsetting acts but does not allow them to have or express feelings about their actions. Tony's case is unique among the crew: he seems to have made peace with the lifestyle but does not understand why his mother treats him as she does. 

Rewatching the Sopranos S1 E12, Isabella

Family Events: Tony is both worried and depressed about Pussy's apparent disappearance but brightens when he meets Cusamano's cousin Isabella, a dental student staying next door. After his therapy session he runs into Isabella and takes her to lunch. While chatting, Tony has a vision of her nursing an infant named Antonio. Livia comes to dinner that evening and scoffs at the idea that Tony is depressed but becomes upset when Tony refuses to stay for her insults. The next day Livia attends a film with Junior and insists what they've planned is justified given Tony's disturbing condition. Tony is attacked outside his vehicle, shot, and then crashes into a parked car. In the hospital, Carmela confronts Tony about the danger he's in but he refuses to acknowledge it. Livia and Junior show up to visit Tony after the shooting and Livia makes a comment suggesting she doesn't recognize Meadow. Junior confronts Livia about the botched hit and her sudden memory loss but she insists she doesn't understand.

Tony sees Cusamano and asks after Isabella; Dr. Cusamano knows nothing of her whatsoever. 

Mafia Events: At a funeral, Jimmy Altieri openly asks Junior about the hit on Brenden
Filone; Mikey informs Junior that the hit on Tony is happening the next day. Christopher updates Tony on what's happening in the crew and is concerned about his depression so he follows him out. Just as the hit is about to go down, Christopher blocks the street and thwarts the attempt. 

Mental Health Events: Melfi explains that the lithium she's prescribed is meant to kick start his system, but Tony says he feels dead. "I don't even know why I come here." Melfi suggests Tony consider a residential treatment program but Tony says he'd rather kill himself. Carmela brings Tony to Melfi's car for an impromptu therapy meeting where they discuss whose knowledge of Tony's treatment might be implicated in motivating the attempt on his life. Tony tears up when he tells Melfi about the vision he had of Isabella nursing the baby. Melfi explains this fantasy is about him, desiring the nurturing the baby was getting. Later when the lithium is revealed to be the source of Tony's fantasy of Isabella, Melfi draws further conclusions about the meaning of the hallucination.

Significant Ideology: Tony wants a nurturing mother so badly he hallucinated one. Funny how the momentary "escape" from his crippling depression was at the hands of just what he needs. The question of what Livia saw as the end game to this assassination still remains to be seen: either through her own skill or the help of the crew loyal to Tony Carmela would have eventually figured out Junior and Livia's involvement, did Livia think this would get her house back? Clearly Green Grove would have been out in the absence of Tony, it may have actually worked, if Carmela simply washed her hands of the entire business and someone (Junior) intervened to stop the sale of the house. However, Livia instead turns on Junior and plays up dementia instead, suggesting she is afraid of Tony's retaliation, knowing he'd likely figure out her role. 

On some level, Tony has known his mother was troubled: ineffective as a parent and unable to provide love and nurturing, and victim to depression, anxiety, and possibly one of three personality disorders. Did he consider her to be capable of arranging to have him killed? From the beginning of the season he's tried many times to prove his love to Livia (with the exception of almond biscotti bringing a somewhat positive reaction) but fails to elicit anything close to love or even kindness back from her. What will he do about this?

Rewatching The Sopranos S1 E10 "A Hit is a Hit"

Family Events: After gifting Dr. Cusamano a box of illegal Cuban cigars to thank him for his referral to Melfi, Tony attempts to branch out and socialize with some of the wealthy neighborhood families (who he coins, "the mayonnaises up the street"). Carmela worries about money. After Meadow eavesdrops on Carmela purchasing stocks, Carmela suggests that women should maintain individuality. After Tony realizes that Cusamano and his wealthy friends are using him as a token criminal association, Tony begins playing up fictional performances to mess with them. 

Mafia Events: Pussy, Chris, and Paulie kill a young drug dealer in New York and bring home tons of his cash, which Tony wants to invest in stocks, legally. After Chris makes a racist scene in a restaurant, he and Adriana get invited to a party with rapper Massive Genius, where he explains he wants royalties from Hesh. Christopher arranges a meeting with Hesh; Adriana toys with the idea of becoming a music manager and introduces Massive to some musician friends. Hesh refuses to consider paying anything. After several struggles, Adriana's new band Visiting Day records a demo for Massive G, which he likes. Suspecting Massive has his eye on Adriana, Chris takes the demo to Hesh, who says the music is terrible. 

Mental Health Events: Melfi has dinner with the Cusamanos and a few others and becomes uncomfortable when the group begins to discuss the Mafia, going as far as to defend Carmela's Murano glass after Jean dismisses it. Later in the bathroom, Melfi looks out the window toward the Soprano house and hears a loud groan. In therapy, Tony admits he's bored by his neighbors, but after golfing with them realizes they made him into a spectacle. Tony shares a story about Jimmy from the old neighborhood, a kid with a cleft palate who was bullied by. the crew, and admits to Melfi that Cusamano and his group made him feel like Jimmy.

Significant Ideology: The importance of each group's cultural identity can be considered both superficially and in greater depth. On the surface, the episode deals with three cultures at odds with each other: Hesh, who is Jewish and is connected to both the early music industry and the Mafia, refuses to pay royalties he owes; Massive Genius, who is African American and a successful producer himself, is open to business with Adriana but seeks justice from Hesh over exploited music vocals; Christopher and Tony are proximally involved through their protection of Adriana and Hesh. 

There are many cultural stereotypes tossed around by each group, Christopher and Hesh use racist language toward Massive Genius, Massive Genius suggests certain exploitative and legally related behaviors are common to Jewish people, and the upper class, professional Italians look down on the Sopranos and anyone in organized crime. But Cusamano's comment about the similarities between the mob and legitimate businessmen is important, not because they are the same in the way that he thinks, but because the white American businessman has largely been able to achieve without "whacking someone." Surely crimes are committed in business, but they're not judged in the way the Mafia's, gangster rap culture, or to lesser extent, Hesh's crimes are judged. 

When Tony discusses his "Medigan" neighbors with Melfi, she tries to clarify, "you don't consider yourself white?" Tony says he does, but that he's not white the way Cusamano is white. It seems like this episode is about ethnicity, and it is, but it's about economic class even more. Hesh had to exploit someone else's talent passed off as his own in order to succeed in the music business; Tony, born into his father's Mafia wanted a good life which was only attainable through criminal means, and Massive Genius used his violent experiences to create art, which then became marketable. All three cultures were denied access to the legitimate American dream, because of their social and economic classes. Adriana is dangled before us as someone who has the potential to successfully cross cultures in a legitimate way, but in the end Christopher and Massive Genius reduce her to a sexual thing, ignoring her enthusiasm and ambition to succeed in the music business, which is easily and commonly done to women in lower economic classes. 

Tony's financial worth and beautiful house may rival Cusamano's, but despite being literal next-door neighbors, he is still kept out of the upper class Italians' spaces (Ivy League, stock trading, the golf club). This is likely going to become an issue for the Soprano children, especially Meadow.

Italian Language: 

Paisan =   ("Talk about Paisan Pride, go Jovi! ") fellow Italian American

Medigan = American

Salcicc' = Italian sausage made of fresh pork and scraps of pancetta and pork neck

Que coso, ragazzo? = what's the thing, boy? (Adriana asks Chris when he's being distant).

Tony wraps a secret package for Cusamano with Carmela's help: 

Rewatching The Sopranos S1 E9 "Boca"

Family Events: Livia again brings up Tony's seeing a psychiatrist with Junior, referring to Tony as, "my son, the mental patient." Tony and Carmela attend Meadow's soccer game and are inspired by the team's coach, Don Hauser. After the girls get together in the park, Meadow finds her friend Ally just after she's cut her own wrist. Tony soon finds out the coach has taken a position in New England; Silvio and Artie pay Hauser a visit to implore him to stay. Meadow becomes increasingly hostile toward Hauser and soccer in general; she admits Ally has been having an affair with the coach. 

Mafia Events: Junior hides out from any possible indictments in his lawyer's office but decides to vacation to Boca Raton with his girlfriend, Roberta San Fillipo. In Boca, Bobbi speaks candidly with Junior about his oral abilities but Junior doesn't want anyone to know he does it out of fear of appearing weak. Tony's crew delivers a big screen to the coach and he becomes hostile, stating he refuses to be threatened or bribed. Later one of Carmela's friends hears Bobbi's manicurist speaking with her about the topic Junior wanted to avoid and soon everyone knows. 

Mikey, acting on suspicions that Tony is informing the feds, has Tony followed. During a golf game with Junior, Tony is angered by a comment from Junior and begins ridiculing him armed with the new information about Bobbi; Junior retorts with a comment about psychiatry. In the locker room after the golf game, Junior floats the idea of having Tony "clipped" to Mikey. Artie begs Tony not to harm Hauser; Tony explodes at Artie for his audacity but decides not to act in the end.

Junior angrily confronts Bobbi about her inability to keep his secret, smashes a pie into her face (a nod to Cagney and the grapefruit), and fires her from the job he gave her.

Mental Health Events: Tony discusses Ali's suicide attempt with Melfi and apologizes for his outburst the week before. When Tony shares his frustrations over the situation with Ally and the coach, Melfi demands to know why Tony thinks he needs to deal with it, himself. 

Significant Ideology: The actions of Coach Hauser are serious and require serious attention, both in the fictional world for the characters as they navigate such disturbing abuse and for the viewers, who are equally shocked and upset by these events. The writing of this episode seems to rely on this shock value to take focus off some of the more confusing points ---the coach randomly takes a job in New England and is leaving an entire year in advance, before the season ends? He loves Ally but won't leave his wife? Meadow plays soccer now, not volleyball and hangs out with Heather Dante, Ally, and Deena, the coach's daughter but not Hunter? Melfi kind of blowing Tony's legitimate second-hand trauma over Ally's suicide attempt (which she'd before done in the past, not connected with the Coach affair)? For a serious topic such as suicide, it all seemed kind of thrown together. 

The problem with Junior has more depth. Carmela's light (ambiguous) teasing of Junior arouses only Tony's suspicion and in the end is harmless until she tells Tony what she knows. Tony may have kept his own teasing under the radar on the golf course but because Junior insulted him first, for making too much noise when Mikey was teeing off (and then suggesting Tony failed to make a play as a high school athlete because he was talking then, too), Tony, who becomes angry and can't keep himself from retaliating, goes full throttle into  cunnilingus-inspired mockery of Junior. Tony responds to being hurt by Junior by humiliating Junior in return; Junior responds to the humiliation by escalating what was until then knowledge he was willing to live with (Tony seeing a psychiatrist) to the suggestion of full on war. Junior brings Mikey up to speed in the locker room, knowing that Mikey has no choice but to support him:

Mikey: "Are you thinking of having him clipped?" 

Junior: "No one would slap my wrist if I did . . . " 

Things are about to get violent, all because these men cannot be seen to lose macho in the eyes of their peers (I give my lady oral) OR to be honest about their true feelings (what you just said was really hurtful). 

Italian Language: 

lecca fica = what Junior doesn't want to admit he does for Bobbi

Tony and Junior: the fighting words begin

Rewatching The Sopranos S1 E8 "The Legend of Tennessee Moltisanti"

Family Events: Carmela takes Livia out so Tony can hide contraband in her room at Green Grove. When the FBI shows up at the house, they find nothing. Livia tells Junior that Tony has been seeing a psychiatrist. 

Mafia Events: Christopher dreams of Emil Kolar, the man he killed at Satriale's Deli just before federal indictments get handed out after the wedding of a family friend. Tony and Carmela clear money and guns out of a secret hiding space in the ceiling vent. Christopher works on his screenplay but is dismayed when he's not mentioned on a news update about the indictments. He snaps and shoots a bakery employee in the foot, admits to Paulie that Emil is haunting him in his dreams, and he digs up Emil's corpse with Georgie. Tony reprimands Chris for his actions but learns that Chris might be dealing with his own depression. Chris is later overjoyed to see his name finally mentioned in the New Jersey Star-Ledger. 

Mental Health Events: Tony explains that he might disappear for a while and for Melfi not to worry. Later when Tony returns, Melfi angers him by charging him for the session he missed during the FBI issues. 

Significant Ideology: Livia sat on the psychiatrist information for one episode before taking it to Junior, but she waited for chaos to begin first. Her actions lately suggest she's become accustomed to Green Grove, might even be enjoying it there, but for her to tattle on Tony to Junior is an act of war---punishment to Tony. Stone cold. 

Chris thinks life is like a movie, and that his life as a wiseguy should follow Goodfellas. Writing a screenplay is a challenge for seasoned writers, let alone people who have little grasp on grammar or spelling. Paulie does little to ease Chris's frustrations with how real life really is in the gangster world ("I was born, spent a few years in the army, a few more in the can, now this,"), and then in the car to Tony, Chris laments the "regularness of life." Reality has its lulls; Tony knows this and now Chris does, too.

Italian Language: 

Coma stai = How are you?

manugia l'american = (unknown, said by Adriana to Chris in regard to his misspelling of the word "managed").

strunz = (from stronzo, worthless)

Tony and Carmela gather the goods to stash:

Rewatching The Sopranos S1 E6 "Pax Soprana"

Family Events: Livia seems happier at Green Grove, but when Junior comes for a visit she implies that Junior should receive monetary benefits from Tony's relationship with Hesh. Carmela tries to voice her frustration with Tony's not being sexually interested in her any longer, later she buys furniture to soothe herself. Carmela discusses her jealousy of Melfi with Father Phil, who tells her she's not blameless. Tony apologizes to Carmela and she admits she wants to be the woman who helps him.

Mafia Events: Junior makes changes down the ranks: strong-arming a card game, taxing Hesh, and seeking a drug dealer who sold deadly stuff to a colleague's grandson. Tony meets with New York's Johnny Sack about how to handle Junior and the two cook up a scheme to get him to come down on the tax amount. Mikey murders Rusty Irish, the drug dealer in question, by throwing him off a bridge, and the captains discuss how to handle Junior's recklessness. Tony persuades Junior to distribute Hesh's tax among the top five captains; Tony returns his share to Hesh.

Mental Health Events: Tony continues to have Makazian spy on Dr. Melfi. In
session, Melfi suggests Tony's choice of her (female, Italian) as a doctor might indicate his desire, through "coming clean" with her, to dialog with Livia, Carmela, and Meadow. Tony informs Melfi he has been experiencing a decreased libido from the prozac but keeps having sexual dreams about her. In the next session, Tony lies about events that happened with Irina and after complimenting Melfi, tries to kiss her. Melfi suggests they need to talk further about this event but Tony refuses. Later Melfi discovers someone has had ailing starter on her car replaced. Tony admits to fixing the car, and then tells Melfi he loves her. Melfi tries to explain that he's feeling this way because the therapy has progressed well.

Significant Ideology: Tony seeks a relative peace (Pax Soprana) within his both of his families---with Carmela over his lies and therapeutic relationship with Melfi and with Junior, over his need to make a splash as he takes the reins as new boss. In both cases, Tony is dishonest and manipulative, to Carmela, whom he professes to love but devotes all his energies to pursuing Melfi, and to Junior, behind whose back Tony schemes with Johnny Sack, Hesh, and the captains of his own crew in order to establish control. Funny how despite this need for control, Tony accepts Melfi's rebuff and continues therapy. While being told "no" might not be something Tony is used to, he takes it from her and then later paraphrases her words to Carmela ("what you think you're feeling, you're not feeling, and what you're not feeling is your real agenda,"). Tony seems to respect her enough to realize on some level that Melfi is right. This power differential is both unlike and exactly like one he's already experienced, he just isn't able to see it yet.

Melfi has been right about a lot of things so far, but her being an Italian woman does create an interesting dynamic in how Tony views the therapy and himself, given how much he personally needs a strong, compassionate person in his life. This powerful transference of Tony's needs onto Melfi could make for an explosively dangerous situation down the line if not addressed, but Melfi addresses it almost immediately. Tony has likely encountered men who have had more power and control in his life, but Melfi is teaching him how his mother (and her own mental illness) has colored his perceptions in his family and business life,  and why this matters at all: 

1. What do your mother, your wife, and your daughter all have in common?

2. It's not appropriate to bring me gifts.

3. You've made me all of the things that are missing in your wife and in your mother.

The panic attacks were just the beginning.

Italian Language: 

Morte = dead 

Putan' = prostitute (Livia to Junior,  "What are you wearing? You smell like a French putan'")

che brutta = how ugly (Livia, "I'm going to the dining room to get away from the che brutta activities lady,")

Capisce = he understands

mezzo morte = half dead (Junior to Tony, "You been walking around mezzo morte all week!")

Livia accepts biscotti ONLY IF THEY ARE ALMOND: 

Junior gets a new card

Rewatching The Sopranos S1 E4 Meadowlands

Family Events: Anthony fights in school, Carmela presses for more details. Tony brings Livia macaroons from her favorite bakery but she reacts very negatively despite initially being pleased. Tony meets with Lieutenant Vin Makazian, a detective he hires to check on Melfi. Makazian ends up assaulting Melfi's date on a traffic stop. AJ demands money from Jeremy, the kid he fought with, and the two again scuffle and make plans to fight after school. Instead of fighting, Jeremy pays AJ the money owed for the shirt and exits. AJ speaks with Meadow about why Jeremy was scared to fight him and Meadow explains what Tony does for a living.

Mafia Events: Christopher gets released from the hospital and finds Brendan dead in his apartment. Tony has a near miss with Silvio in the hall at the medical office. The crew visits a declining Jackie, and Chris plans to seek revenge on Mikey for killing Brendan. Tony prevents Chris from acting but assaults Mikey with a staple gun and confronts Junior himself. Junior refuses to cooperate and sends Tony away. The council of captains discusses how best to deal with the situation with Junior and want Tony promoted to acting boss while Jackie is sick. Chris assaults an employee after Junior's crew took his cut of drug money while he was in the hospital. At the Bing, the crew gets news that Jackie Apriel has died, and Chris shares the news that Junior is moving in on their turf. Tony confronts Junior again and surprises him in offering him Jackie's position as boss. 

Mental Health Events: Tony dreams of seeing all his friends in the therapy waiting room; when Melfi turns around, in her chair is Livia in disguise. After a mild panic attack, Tony receives Xanax from Melfi to get him through the stressful week. When Tony tells Melfi about his frustrations in dealing with Junior and Livia, she suggests Tony give them illusion of still being in control, to handle them like children. Melfi admits to Tony she's upset by the assault on her date.

Significant Ideology: Roles change in this episode: AJ, the only remaining family member ignorant of Tony's true occupation, learns the truth and like everyone else becomes an accomplice to it. Tony becomes acting boss of not only Junior but presumably Livia as well (though we have yet to see how this plays out) after Melfi's suggestion and book recommendation. Even before this though, Tony had unique insight into his business dealings that Junior and Chris lack, neither being fathers. Junior is angry at the perceived disrespect Chris has shown toward him but also at Tony's refusal to hand out punishment. Chris expects immediate action and retaliation for Junior's murder of Brendan (which Mikey goaded Junior into committing by playing up the disrespect factor) and twice has to be restrained from acting impulsively. In the first case, Tony acts himself, taking the staple gun to Mikey, and in the second case, having just heard the news about Jackie's passing, Tony admonishes Chris and bullies him physically into standing down so he can approach Junior with the plotted offer of boss. 

Tony has also learned to pick his battles with Livia, which lessens her power over him. "You could be happy here, if you wanted to," he tells her before leaving with the macaroons she rejected. It's almost as if since having his panic attacks under control he's able to think two steps ahead of everyone else's actions instead of simply reacting with aggression. Despite this, his need for control remains, evident in his need to know intimate details about Dr. Melfi and in employing Makazian to spy on her.

Italian Language: 

Cialtrone = rascal/scoundrel (Junior tells Tony, "You crazy cialtrone, you had me worried, there.")

Jackie Apriel's Funeral:

Rewatching The Sopranos S1 E3 "Denial, Anger, Acceptance"

Family Events: Meadow feels the stress of studying for SATs; Tony and Carmela visit Artie and Charmaine Bucco in their new house. To help the Buccos, Carmela hires them to cater a pediatric hospital fundraiser at the house. Charmaine is receptive to the honest work until Carmela gestures to her as she had done earlier with her housekeeper. As they box up the effects after the party, Charmaine admits to Carmela that she slept with Tony back in high school and that she's fine with her life decisions. Meadow asks Christopher and Brendan to score her some crystal to help study for exams, which he does. Tony joins Carmela for Meadow's choir concert and is moved to tears by his daughter's singing.

At Green Grove Junior floats the idea of punishing Christopher to Livia but is surprised to hear Livia profess her love for Chris ("he put up my storm windows for me one year,"). Suggesting that Chris could rather use a talking-to but shrugging an implication of something more severe for Brendan, sly Livia colludes with Junior to hurt Tony. Junior arranges to have Christopher roughed up by Russians but sends his own man, Mikey Palmice to shoot Brendan. 

Mafia Events: Chris and Brendan return the jacked truck to Comley; Junior is not placated. Tony and the crew visit boss Jackie Apriel in the hospital and discuss getting involved with Teittleman, a Hasidic Jew, who wants a divorce for his daughter. Tony gifts Jackie an escort and booze in his hospital room while Paulie and Silvio assault Teittleman's son-in-law, Ariel. After Ariel finally agrees to give them what they want, Teittleman tries to get out of paying Tony the agreed-upon sum. Tony tries to relay the drama to Jackie back in the hospital, but Jackie is preoccupied with his temperature.

Mental Health Events: Tony accuses Melfi of hanging a depressing painting of a barn outside her office to trick him but then admits he's worried about his friend Jackie, who has cancer. Later Tony asks Melfi for her medical thoughts on Jackie's cancer but becomes immediately defensive when she tells him her honest opinion and stomps out, again mentioning the painting of the barn. Later with his Russian mistress, Irina, Tony asks her what a poolside painting above her bed means to her. 

Tony eventually comes clean with Melfi about mourning Jackie but insists he's not afraid to die for a reason.

Significant Ideology: Faced with the devotion of the Hasid,  Tony comes to terms with the fact that some deaths have more meaning than others. He realizes Jackie's death is imminent and will be a cancer casualty, and will not reflect the strength of the man he once was. Tony references Jackie's appearance and formerly harsh attitude as if to reinforce that the gangster inside Jackie still exists and brings him a Bada Bing employee to enjoy (Jackie may be sick but he can still bang). The full masculine power of the mafia is in focus during this episode, so it's no surprise that the final threat to Ariel is to remove his manhood, what could possibly be worse than that?

However, Tony seems to be learning in therapy. After Melfi explains how the ducks and the barn painting "took on another meaning" for him because of his inner feelings, Tony asks Irina what she thinks of her painting. Teittleman calls him a golem, a Frankenstein, but Tony all but sheds tears for Jackie in Melfi's office and also during Meadow's choir concert. 

Italian Language: 

Statti zit = shut up 

Rewatching The Sopranos S1 E2, "46 Long"

Family Events: AJ's teacher's Saturn is stolen, Carmela suggests Tony help find the car. When Tony calls Livia to check in on her she neglects a pan of mushrooms on the stove and starts her kitchen on fire. After the fire department leaves the house, Carmela tries to reason with Livia, suggesting she get someone in to help her, but Livia refuses. Eventually Perrilyn, a Trinidadian housekeeper, is hired to help but Livia sabotages the relationship almost immediately. Later Livia accidentally injures herself and a friend with her vehicle and Tony insists she live at Green Grove Retirement Community. When clearing out his mother's house, Tony becomes emotional over old pictures of Livia smiling.

Mafia Events:

As Tony and the gang count money they watch a former wiseguy turned informant discuss the overall decline of organized crime. Unwillingness to do hard time for drug charges is what has brought the mafia down, the man explains. Later, Christopher and friend Brendan Filone hijack a semi full of DVD players and distribute the goods to the crew. The truck belongs Comley, one of Junior's legitimate business partnerships, and after a sit down between Tony, Junior, and boss Jackie Apriel, the two are made to pay restitution to Junior. Feeling unappreciated and ignored, Chris and Brendan plan to jack another Comley truck in defiance, this one full of Italian suits, but Chris backs out at the last minute. Tony and the crew keep some of the suits but chastise Chris for not stopping Brendan.

Mental Health Events: Tony speaks with Dr. Melfi about his guilt over Livia's living situation; Melfi tries to gently draw attention to Livia's parental shortcomings but Tony becomes defensive. Tony later relays his near panic attack during the cleaning out of Livia's house and Melfi points out that he's made progress in having awareness of his sadness but that he needs to acknowledge his anger before it seeps out to other outlets. Tony scoffs at this idea but then randomly beats Bada Bing bouncer Georgie for not being able to manage the telephone.

Significant Ideology: It's interesting that this episode begins with a mafia informer telling the audience that long prison time (hard consequences of criminal acts) led to the demise of organized crime as the crew looks on in agreement while counting piles of cash, presumably earned from the same actions described, still ongoing within the business. They acknowledge the truth but refuse to make changes that may help them avoid the very outcome being discussed. They don't listen. Or if they do listen and understand it doesn't matter because they don't change their behavior. 

The same thing happens with Chris and the Comley trucks. He listens, nods, agrees, but does little to show Tony he understands the problem in his rogue act and what it means for the organization, not to mention Tony's relationship with Junior. When Melfi tries to make Tony aware of the anger he's stifling, he listens to a point but then stomps out of the office, unwilling to admit she's right. He is so angry about his mother's treatment of him that he releases physical violence on an innocent colleague. 

Tony and crew have shown they have the ability to think critically about topics such as cloning or cultural appropriation (ala Starbucks), they also have advanced capacity for strategy: the Mahaffey scam, playing Chris and Brendon's misdeed for an ultimate financial/material gain, obtaining the science teacher's stolen car for leverage with AJ's grade, and so on. The fact that a hard warning waved in their faces does not deter the actions of any of these men suggests a very primitive way of thinking and behaving. Are they defiant (if you try to tell me what to do I'll do the exact opposite) or simply impulsively selfish (I want this thing so badly and so immediately that I cannot think logically and must have immediate gratification in getting it)? 

Italian Language: 

Indifendibile = indefensible (Paulie shouts this or something like it to the tv)

Chiaccherone = chatty (Paulie refers to the informant on tv)

pastin = "pastina" or little pasta (Carmela offers to make Livia some pastin to get something in her stomach after the mushroom fire incident)

O trippa di zia = or aunt's tripe (Pussy laments this after going through the paperwork at the body shop after having been away for six months).

Marone = Madonna or Madon, used similarly to 'dammit.' (Paulie laments this in frustration at the many options at what is meant to be Starbucks). 

Puzzi = stink (Paulie explains Americans ate "puzzi" before Italian cuisine became available). 

Fiori = flowers

(il tempo e la pazienza) cambiano la foglia di gelso in seta = Time and patience change the mulberry leaf to silk (Bonnie DiCaprio at Green Grove says this to Livia). 

Rewatching The Sopranos, S1 E1 "Pilot"

Family Events: Tony Soprano (James Gandolfini) has a lot going on in his life. Son Anthony, Junior (Robert Iler) turns thirteen, daughter Meadow (Jamie Lynn Siegler) rebels against wife Carmela (Edie Falco). Mother Livia (Nancy Marchand) resists the idea of assisted living and is generally unpleasant. Tony cheats on Carmela; Uncle Junior (Dominic Chianese) resents Tony's being in charge. Tony admits being in therapy to Carmela but does not disclose the fact that his therapist, Dr. Melfi (Lorraine Bracco) is a woman.

Mafia Events: Mahaffey is assaulted by Tony's nephew Christopher Moltisanti (Michael Imperioli) and Tony for defaulting on gambling debts, Christopher shows initiative by executing the son of one of Tony's waste management rivals. Hesh (Jerry Adler), a former colleague of Tony's father, helps Tony with a plan to extract the money owed by Mahaffey. Silvio Dante (Stevie van Zandt) informs Tony that Junior plans to kill rival Pussy Malanga inside childhood friend Artie Bucco's restaurant; Tony tries to get Artie (John Ventimiglia) to leave town but ends up destroying the restaurant in an explosion. Christopher feels unappreciated in his work and mentions writing a screenplay.

Mental Health Events: Tony meets Dr. Jennifer Melfi for therapy after panic attacks, storms out of first session when asked if he felt depressed. Returns for second session after collapsing at Green Grove Retirement Community with mother Livia. Tony describes mixed feelings about family of ducks in his pool. Melfi prescribes Prozac, which Tony takes. Tony skips a therapy appointment, begins to feel better, and assumes he won't need to return; Melfi suggests that talking about his thoughts and feelings is what is helping. Tony becomes tearful in a discussion over the ducks and realizes he is afraid of losing his family.

Significant Ideology: Tony's infidelities are referenced and later shown; he is a powerful, desirable man who has significant appetites in both women and lifestyle. His house is enormous, he dines in fancy restaurants, he plays golf. Yet the first thing he mentions to Dr. Melfi is that despite having "reached the heights," he still feels unsatisfied. Why? He's the boss, he's in charge, he has a family that loves him, what is the reason for his unhappiness? Spoiler alert: IT'S PROBABLY HIS MOTHER, but could it also have been his having bought into the the capitalist myth that money buys happiness? Material excess and extravagant lifestyle are indeed popular glamours of the mafia genre, the mob boss synonymous with unrestricted wealth and greed, but always at a price. Mafia films were once regulated by the Hays code (you could make a film about a criminal but he had to meet a violent end, because morals), so we're used to seeing consequences of negative or violent actions be realized, but what consequences can we expect in Anthony Soprano's story? Will therapy help, or is he better off not knowing what's at the heart of his anxiety and depression?

Italian Language: 

Sfogliatelle = Italian dessert pastry ("Hey girls, you want some of last night's sfogliatelle?").

Se dici = "If you say," (Junior yells this or something like it to Tony after he tells him not to get Anthony Junior anything big for his birthday).

Goomara = Mafia mistress. ("Well, havin' that goomara on the side helps," Carmela responds when Tony states that no marriage is perfect). 

vaffancul' = vaffanculo = F--- You ("Then it's dysfunction this, and dysfunction that, and dysfunction VAFFANCUL'!" Tony, to Dr. Melfi, describing Gary Cooper getting in touch with his feelings). 

Stugots = sto cazzo = personal possessive of male sex organ (Tony's boat is named "Stugots").

Buenosera = Good Evening (in restaurant).

da queste parte = around here (in restaurant).

Agita = shake ("I'm all agita all the time!" Junior, in solidarity with Livia's being very upset about the state of the world). 

Meet Livia: 

The Sopranos, season 6, part two, proper.

I finally finished. And I will again stand by my previous statements; this is honestly one of the best shows created. Anthony, it hasn't always been easy, but I'm really going to miss you. 

So how do things wind down in the second half of season six? 

Melfi can't handle the peer pressure from her shrink friends and dumps Tony as a patient just after his son's suicide attempt. As he's leaving, he says to her, "I think what you're doing, as a doctor, is immoral," then stuffs a steak recipe he had earlier stolen back into one of her expensive magazines in the waiting room and storms out. It made me not like her. 

AJ is a wreck, attempts suicide and is hospitalized. "He was our happy little boy," Carmela weeps as they all watch his psychiatrist wheel him away. I loathe AJ but this was difficult and emotional for me to watch.

Phil Leotardo takes out Bobby Bacala and severely wounds Silvio; Paulie is basically the last man standing in Tony's crew. The FBI aspect (watching this time around) was important, as Agent Harris, currently working terrorism but still with a soft spot for Tony, is instrumental in Tony's overall survival and triumph over Phil. The decline of Agent Harris was a little sad, considering he really seemed to enjoy his work back when he was planting bugging devices and hanging around Satriales just like one of the guys. First came the parasite from Pakistan then the longer, more stressful hours, and strain on his wife---the poor guy looked just beaten down by the end. One of my *very* favorite scenes in the entire show (linked to another from season 2 that shows Harris's obvious fondness for Tony) was when, after hearing of Phil Leotardo's death, Harris jumps up from his desk shouting, "YES! We're gonna WIN THIS THING!" I don't think there's any two ways about what he says---he means TONY, not the FBI. How sweet. 

The Finale: There are so many things about this that are brilliant, not the least being its ambiguity, but I was one of the three people who really loved the way the show ended, and loved it even more after watching it a second time. 

If Tony Lives, the family reoccupies their places around a table, eating, just as they did at the finale of the first season. AJ said just before Meadow arrived that they should remember the good times, as Tony did previously at Vesuvio. Meadow chooses a law career, focusing on civil rights of minority groups; AJ had formerly been interested in a military or intelligence career in order to fight terrorism but then accepts Tony's help in launching into film (via Little Carmine). The bigger theme here ("Made in America") is that both Tony's children, while at first insistent in putting as much space between themselves and Tony and Tony's livelihood as possible, completely turn around and choose careers that intertwine them deeper to him, Meadow, criminal law and AJ, the family business as Carmine Lupertazzi's development assistant. They grew up with advantages, had opportunities to leave, and both chose to stay. Tony Soprano is at root, a family man and life goes on.

If Tony Dies, the link to gangster cinema is firm, and precursors from The Godfather (beginning all the way back with that orange cat) abound. As there is no one left on Phil's crew, the hit had to be authorized by Carmine or another New York family, and that particular bit isn't all too clear or motivated, but there are a few things that can't really be ignored. The lingering white hoodlum-type gets up and goes to the bathroom just as Michael Corleone went into the bathroom before hitting the table of cops in the restaurant. Why? Just before the very end, two African American men, a little gangster-ish, come wandering in and will presumably walk directly past Tony's table. Why? These are conscious choices made by David Chase, and significant ones, just as the fact that Meadow can't quite get her car parked in a spot twenty-five feet wide on the street is significant. There was happiness at the table, and as far as conversations with AJ had gone in the past, the mood was downright chipper. Journey plays on the juke "Don't Stop Believin;" and they all enjoy the best onion rings in New Jersey. If Tony and the rest of the family gets clipped in the diner, they die happy or having at least experienced good times, as Tony had hoped for his family. In ending that way, Tony Soprano becomes at root, The Godfather and his story, epic.

My own personal thoughts on the finale are that I don't care which is true, only that Tony picked that song and that it started when Carmela walked in. (Matt sang this to me when I was 18, waiting tables at the Sheep Shedde).