Sunday, January 31, 2010

Winner, winner, chicken dinner.

This is a movie that I really, really would have enjoyed when I was about 16. I wanted to like it a lot now, but I am definitely not the target audience for this sort of film, although i will say that it was entertaining. Supposedly it was based on a true story (Bringing Down the House by Ben Mizrich) of six actual MIT students who counted cards in Vegas. The story is good but the film took way too long to get where it needed to go. I've said it before and I"ll say it again: occupational insider stories need to be extremely well done when they try to branch out and have a plot outside the real meat of the story. This unfortunately was not accomplished here, all the extraneous crap just got in the way and left me feeling bored and impatient for the gambling. Maybe I'm just an impatient viewer.

This, however, is infinitely more my style. I don't know why, but this one is my favorite. Maybe it's just better without Julia Roberts skulking around, annoying me. This whole movie is just. . . clever. Having the subtitles on really helped with the gambling terms and some of their more "inside" banter. I love, love, LOVE when everyone wins at the end. Dollar amounts above their heads? YES! The little looks they give each other to set things in motion? YES! The music? YES! Just brilliant. Well done, everyone.

Monday, January 18, 2010

2 hours of Bauer.

a few things so far, about 30 minutes in.

1. "JACK BAUER?" how many times can it be uttered?

2. Freddie Prinze is fine, but the girlfriend who also works for CTU is very mannish. A tall, mannish-looking mannequin. I don't want to seem prudish, but somehow I think a more professional dress code needs to be implemented? The sleeveless dress doesn't quite seem office-appropriate for CTU. Leave the jacket on, or take a page out of Renee's book from last year. I can't take you seriously as an CTU analyst when you look like you should instead be an Aveda consultant.

3. Bubba Gump is the director of CTU.

4. Horace (mathematician) from LOST is the Russian terrorist.

5. The "hitter' is very Amanda Plummer in Tales from the Crypt (PEGGY!) creepy. Meredith Michelle Reed. Ick. Blonds don't usually fare well on this show. Kim, the chicks in season 2, etc.

5. Kim Bauer sucks, as usual. Just gross.

6. Kim Bauer's hairstylist on the show has continuously made poor decisions for her, if it's been the same person all this time.

7. Grandpa Bauer? Whose bad idea was this? I hope for the sake of the plausibility of the story here that somehow this granddaughter factors into something significant down the road, otherwise, why, WHY do this? We realize that Jack is getting old, we do not need him in a grandfather role to further confirm this fact. AND NAMED TERRI, of course. This utter ridiculousness is almost completely page for page out of the Twilight books (and that is NOT a compliment). Although if you want to get picky, you could argue that Kim Bauer was the catalyst that set Terri Bauer's ultimate death in motion (I, for one, completely blame Kim openly for this, little spoiled teenage brat that she was, sneaking out in season 1).

8. I think that sawing the Russian's hand off may have been a bit too . . . reckless for Walker, in the first 4 episodes, anyway. She was always the "play by the rules" chick! Perhaps she's turned a corner and gone off the deep end.

9. Back in 2006 when I was (correctly) prophetizing Tony Almeida's eventual return, someone on a myspace group said it would never happen. That it was so far fetched that it would be like Nina Meyers and Ryan Chappelle strolling, arm-in-arm into CTU one day. Given the way that the show has gone in the last two seasons, I no longer think that even THAT is out of line as a plot twist. I actually would welcome Nina's return, joyfully.

10. You might think I am being overly critical of the show. I probably am, but that doesn't mean I still don't love it dearly. I do. There will always be room in my heart for Jack Bauer, no matter how outlandish the show gets.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Are you fricking KIDDING ME?

unbelievable. I love it.

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Absolutely. Fricking. Brilliant.

I think it should surprise NO ONE that this glorious film achievement was written by none other than JOHN HUGHES. Of course it was. Director Amy Heckerling (Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Clueless, etc.)? Also one of my favorites. I think if I would have gone into film back in the late 90s, these two would have been my best friends (besides JJ Abrams).

One for Clark, one for Rusty, ONE FOR JACK. . . one for Clark.

Let's just count the genius moments in this film:
1. John Astin (game show host) totally MAKING OUT with Audrey/Audrey's rapid fist-pumping dance when they race out onto the stage after winning grand prize

2. "Oh kids, I've saved the best surprise for last." "WE'RE TURNING AROUND AND GOING HOME!"

3. Audrey's food dream.

4. "The hills are alive with the sound of Griswalds. This shit's been around for a very long time. . ."

5. DO YOU WANT THAT IN THE CAN? "No, I'll take it right here."

6. "Do you wanna watch cheese or snow?"


8. Holy SHIT! Is that dude from the bathroom (who almost jumps into the tub with Ellen) FRICKING **HAGRID?**
OMG> HE TOTALLY IS! I just looked up Robbie Coltrane and he is listed as MAN IN THE BATHROOM on the film credits for European Vacation! I KNEW he looked familiar!!! Wow!

9. okay, well, bathroom scene with Hagrid and Ellen, juxtaposed with bedroom scene with Clark and the blond Englishwoman. "Ellen, honey, when did you quit shaving your legs?" "For Christ's sake, they don't even put numbers on the goddamned doors!"

10. The **vehicle** they drive (orange hornet-shaped mobile) through France and Germany.


12. "He may pork her Russ, just eat."

13. "Dear Audrey, I miss the shit outta you. Luckily Debbie's been coming by to cheer me up." "THAT BITCH!!"

14. "My family and I are looking for sex." "Schweinhund!!"

15. "Hey look, Dad, BED PANS!!"

16. The entire German folk dance scene and chase.

17. The entire train ride when they are all annoying each other with different actions.

18. "Debbie? AUDREY. Listen, we got a little score to settle and you know what I mean, so if you wanna salvage the last bit of our friendship you'll do me this favor: Yeah, I need you to book me on a Pan-Am flight outta Rome, into Chicago, TODAY! Yeah, I'll hold. Bitch!"

I saw this film IN THE THEATER with my parents, and my cousins and uncle. I believe my brother was along, so in 1985 I would have been 9 and he would have been 6. And people wonder why we're twisted.