The Battle of Hogwart's: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, pt. 2

Sentimentalists like me usually have a difficult time with things coming to a close, and this film, the final installment of the Harry Potter series, was no exception. How best to describe the epic to end all epics? With an unsentimental rave, of course, because there are no two ways about it--- director David Yates nailed it. Even the trailer makes me cry a little.

When we last left Harry, he, Ron, and Hermione had just buried Dobby the House Elf after being rescued (along with Luna Lovegood, Griphook the Goblin, and Mr. Ollivander) from Malfoy Manor. Beginning first with a sobering picture of Hogwarts as led by new headmaster Severus Snape, the film continues the hunt for Horcruxes as the three plus Griphook break into Bellatrix Lestrange's vault at Gringotts. After the goblin double-crosses them, they bust out of the bank on the back of an albino dragon and return to Hogwarts where they are aided by Dumbledore's brother, Aberforth, and greeted warmly by a dwindling, battered group of students. McGonagall fumes, Snape flees, and Voldemort---now onto the three's hunt for pieces of his split soul---lays siege on the castle. As the frantic search for the last Horcruxes continues, giants, overgrown arachnids, Dementors, werewolves, Death Eaters, and the Elder Wand all threaten to destroy not only Harry, but everything he's ever cared about.The film succeeds in telling this extremely full and complex story by achieving harmony and balance in all that it does. By focusing extremely well on (and at times, overexplaining) the two secondary topics of wand allegiances and the peculiarities of Severus Snape, the film avoids becoming too convoluted in biting off more than it could reasonably chew from the novel. The differences in overall dynamics, calm and subtle versus chaotic and engaging, were also well matched and kept the film from getting lost in explosions and "Avada Kadavras." The subtlety of Snape's observance (from above) of the Hogwart's students from the film's opening moment, which is all the more meaningful for those who've read the novel; the juxtaposition of Harry's plunge into the lake with Voldemort's realization of what they've been doing, ending with a jarring, silent close-up; the sudden casting of Snape into a tender and sentimental light as Harry looks into his memories---these things gave pause and contrast against the constant action and struggle present in the surrounding scenes.

As this epic finale is quite different from any of the other films, the photography and effects were hugely responsible in its success; many of them were visually breathtaking. The albino dragon in the bank's dungeon, McGonagall's knight-soldiers, and the professors' protective shields over the castle are just a few fine examples but there are many more. The music, while consistant with basic battle and tension in the appropriate places, also set the film apart from its predecessors through a minor, vocal opening theme with an almost Braveheart-like melody. It returns again later in the film at a very emotional time as Harry stumbles through the rubble and it's very effective.

Thematically, it might be dissmissive to narrow down an entire (magical!) series to something as simple as Karma and the good old Golden Rule, but well, there it is. Harry buries Dobby, a house elf, with his bare hands as to show his gratitude for his heroism. He risks his life in the room of requirement to save Malfoy, someone who has treated him with nothing but scorn. And during his interlude in the bright place, Harry obviously pities what Voldemort has become, which Dumbledore acknowledges: "Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living. And anyone who lives without love."

Well said, Albus. And thanks for the memories. (sniff).

Stoogey but Successful: Horrible Bosses

Horrible Bosses is a film with universal appeal. Everyone has had an unpleasant boss at least once in their lifetimes, and seeing others onscreen deal with something familiar, even if it's uncomfortable, can be cathartic. And almost everyone out there will appreciate the film's focus, that age-old act of sticking it to The Man. But most people will enjoy this picture because of the reassuring nature that comes from seeing three grown men bumble around ridiculously for ninety minutes--the viewer walks out of the theater reveling in a sense of triumph (hell, at least I'm not that stupid) and fondness (those guys were idiots but they were damned funny).

Directed by Seth Gordon (The King of Kong) and written by Michael Markowitz and John Francis Daley, Horrible Bosses is the story of three friends who want to knock off their respective employers. Nick (Jason Bateman) lost out on a promotion he'd been counting on; Dale (Charlie Day) is being sexually harassed, and Kurt (Jason Sudeikis) has to take orders from his former boss's cocaine-addicted son. Each of the men genuinely enjoys his work, but the bosses make day to day life unnecessarily miserable. The solution? Would-be assassin/Murder Consultant, Mother F-er Jones (Jamie Foxx), theirs for the asking for $5k.

As you could probably guess, things don't go well. There's a lot of cursing, a lot of yuppie banter, and Kurt is mostly a perv, but through it all you get the overwhelming feeling that you're watching the Gen-X version of The Three Stooges, and it works. If you can drop the ideology and laugh (as withBridesmaids), you will. A lot. My theater (AMC Southdale 16) was literally rolling through the entire film and ended it with applause and cheers, which was fun.

Together with the crude humor and constant verbal sparring going on between characters, the film does physical comedy well, too. Jumping cats, bad kung-fu, crazed sifting of cocaine, implied sexual acts with food props, and rear-end humor inside the bosses' domains are all good for chuckles, but the best scene, by far, was the scene shown in the parking lot where, armed with rat poison and peanuts, the three men attempt to drive away in their own vehicles but only end up boxing each other in, nearly colliding, and going in circles. It's not just funny but indicative of the entire vibe of the film and its characters; they drive their cars the way they live their lives and make their plans: thoughtlessly, ridiculously, and like little men-children. 

Other elements of the production that added a lot to the film's overall success and flow were the musical selections and their placements. The Beastie Boys' "Sabotage" was an undeniably perfect accompaniment for Nick's (imagined) attack on his boss (Kevin Spacey) just as The Heavy's "How You Like Me Now?" was a great companion for the scenes depicting the planning of the murders. More goodness: white block description titles of each horrible boss and slow motion shot of the three guys rounding the corner as they're picking up the supplies at the store? Nicely, nicely done. This was a very well-made well thought-out comedy, and one the players clearly enjoyed making (make sure you stay for the end credits!). 

Enjoyable, but where was the Van Halen? Bad Teacher

It's a rare day in Hollywood if a woman is said to be getting better with age, but it's happening to Cameron Diaz. Either that, or her voice has gotten wonderfully lower and she's choosing better roles (along with a killer wrinkle cream that keeps her looking no where near thirty-eight). Bad Teacher is the sort of film that like Billy Madison or Summer School, is at its core silly nonsense, but is filled with enough heart and well-written comedy that you start to love it despite its crude, inappropriate nature. And despite the fact that Diaz's character is mostly unappealing for the entire film, it would be remiss for me (previously not-a-fan) to fail to acknowledge that even considering such distaste, Diaz's performance made the film a lot of fun.

Bad Teacher, directed by Jake Kasdan and co-written by Gene Stupnitsky and Lee Eisenberg (The Office, Year One) is the story of Elizabeth Halsey, a recently dumped, foul-mouthed English teacher who really doesn't want to work. At all. Forget the fact that her seventh grade class is composed of the most unrealistically well-behaved students ever assembled or that the rest of the friendly (albeit McGoo) teaching staff genuinely tries, time after time, to engage with her---she's just lazy, rude, and unmotivated. The silly nonsense angle comes when Elizabeth decides that a pair of breast implants might just give her the edge she needs to snag herself another fiancee, and suddenly she decides to use her connections as a teacher (car wash fundraiser, tutoring, test award bonuses) to get the ten thousand dollars she needs for the operation. 

While not exactly becoming or at all realistic where professional educators are concerned, the teacher characters were interesting and well-written. Amy Squirrel (Lucy Punch) is Elizabeth's across-the-hall neighbor who seems better suited for Kindergarten than middle school; Lynn Davies (Phyllis Smith) is an older, soft spoken woman with whom Elizabeth commiserates over her cash flow problems. Almost stealing the show out from under Diaz are Jason Segal as Russell Gettis, a gym teacher, and Justin Timberlake as substitute Scott Delacorte. While the hip, smooth-talking Russell argues with a student over LeBron James's inferiority to Michael Jordan, Scott, wealthy but awkward, gyrates and sings terribly to 867-5309/Jenny at the school dance, and surprise----Timberlake plays drippy amazingly well! Elizabeth's overall inappropriateness was really well-balanced between Russell and Scott, and both characters added their own specific brand of comedy to the film. A lot of banter over on IMDB seems to indicate viewers having problems with casting, but considering the fact that again, this was a film focused around breast implants (and perhaps secondarily, booze and drugs), the actors couldn't have been better or more comfortable---they knew what they were doing.

One of the most memorable scenes of the film comes just after Elizabeth discovers the lucrative potential of the annual car wash and decides to boost profits by getting involved, herself. Armed with a hose and clad in a tied-up flannel, daisy dukes, and heels, she drapes, flails, and sprays herself over a parked car while the group of junior high boys (not to mention their fathers) looks on, utterly entranced. The soundtrack, Whitesnake's Here I Go, Again, was an excellent bit of nostalgia, although probably wasted on anyone born after 1990 (but nicely played all the same).

And while we're on the topic of luscious eighties rock bands, I refuse to believe there wasn't a way to fit Hot For Teacher in there somewhere, preferably the end credits. Had it in fact happened,

at least one person in the audience would have given it a hollering standing ovation.

There's Hope For Slackers Yet: Green Lantern

In order to enjoy certain films, sometimes it helps to have perspective. This film, Green Lantern, isn't perfect, but it certainly isn't horrible, either. It's one of those slightly above-average films that when seen in an ideal set of circumstances becomes remarkable. Ideal circumstances in this case being after a few drinks or on the extreme cheap. Better yet, see a seriously terrible film the night before, (Vanilla Sky, Gigli) have a few drinks, and make someone drive you to the theater and pay for your ticket, this will give you the necessary perspective and mindset to enjoy this film. Optimism is the key. Too much work, you say? My advice, then, is to stay at home and wait for Transformers or Harry Potter.

Green Lantern, based upon the comic book series by DC Comics, is the story of Hal Jordan (Ryan Reynolds) and his initiation into the intergalactic police force, The Green Lanterns, whose ability is marked by fearlessness and willpower. Despite being a gifted and able test pilot, one of the best in the country, Hal frequently abandons his commitments and folds under pressure. He is chosen by the green ring of a wounded Lantern, who in trying to escape a ferocious enemy (Parallax), crash lands onto Earth and eventually dies. Hal seems a strange choice for a super hero (just as many critics have pointed out that Reynolds was a poor choice for the role)---he's a slacker, he's sarcastic, and he plays by his own rules, but his inner fearlessness and perhaps thirst to prove himself make him a striking would-be Lantern. Many times after doubting himself, Hal is assured by other Lanterns, "the ring is never wrong."  As Hal struggles to accept his new responsibilities, Parallax, who is fueled by the fear of others, looms closer and closer to Earth. Through the "infection" of a biologist (Peter Sarsgaard), and feeding upon the fear of everything he encounters, Parallax plans to destroy Hal, and presumably the Universe after that, although it wasn't all that clear. 

This is not to say that Parallax wasn't without merit; the visual effects were very good, and in his case, extremely frightening---an all-consuming, tentacled monster. Visually, the film was amazing; whether it was Sarsgaard's metamorphosis to evil, the Lanterns' willpower made physical, all the flying, or Ryan Reynolds' body, there was plenty for the eyes. And if you're someone who likes homages to other films, the entire dogfight with the jets in the beginning will feel like a cocky, amped-up Top Gun sequence ("Did you just abandon your wingman as a decoy?") Nice. 

The weakest element of this film is unfortunately the writing, which is a difficult thing to recover from---honestly, I had to check Wikipedia several times in order to answer my own questions about why something happened or character names. This is obviously more of an issue for viewers who haven't read the comics, but it's legitimate. Given the fact that the entity, Parallax, is making his way to Earth (off screen) for much of the time, and the goings-on between Hal and the biologist, Hector, were pretty significant most of the time, the transitions between Hal's business back to Parallax seemed a bit abrupt. You get so focused on Reynolds' and Sarsgaard's scenes that Parallax almost fades away entirely, and when he pops back in, it's jarring because so many other things are going on.

There are other aspects, mostly thematic ones that made the film worth seeing, the Daddy issues of both Hal and the biologist, the Inception-esque way the Lanterns created their items out of thin air, and probably most of all, the upward trajectory of a man who by all definitions was a slacker, a fuck-up. Couldn't we all lose our fearlessness and rise to the occasion like Hal? Would that it were true.

Super 8: A Feeling Person's Blockbuster

There's never a shortage of comparisons or complaints in the sci-fi world, is there? "It's ET, remade." "It's Stand By Me, remade." "It's The Goonies, remade." "J.J Abrams is Steven Spielberg, remade." Forget all that. Super 8 is a film, an excellent one, created by a man who loves films, is skillful at writing and making them, and who hasn't forgotten what it's like to be a child. What more can you ask?

A synopsis is hardly in order, as most everyone has certainly seen the previews by now, so here's what you probably already know: a group of junior high kids witness a train crash while making a zombie film; something scary was in one of the train cars. People start disappearing, electricity starts acting weird, the military shows up, and so on. What you might not know however, is that the principal character, Joe (Joel Courtney), has just lost his mother and like all the best cowboys, has a few daddy issues with his father, a deputy policeman. Super 8 is really two stories, the story of the scary thing that came out of the train car and the story of Joe, his grief, his feelings, and his connections with everyone around him. The film weaves the two tales together brilliantly by the strength of its characters, effects, and skillful use of suspense.

Seeing interesting, likable kids in pain (Joe deals with the loss of his mother and emotional unavailability of his father) or danger (the kids witnessed the train crash and captured the escape of the "cargo" on film) puts the viewer in a state of concern and tension, and by feeding us, little by little, just enough information to sustain those feelings, the film succeeds (not unlike Abrams' LOST) in stretching two basic issues into layers of ongoing questions. Don't fret; these questions eventually all get answered and resolved (and the Super 8 Zombie picture gets finished!).

Much like Martin Scorcese, J.J. Abrams is a director who cares very much for his characters, it's evident in every scene. The lines spoken come from a carefully crafted script and the actors give realistic, moving performances having obviously been coached and directed well. Joe Lamb is just one of the youngsters tearing around town lugging film equipment; the rest of his posse includes Charlie, whose zombie film they're making, Preston, Martin, Cary, and Alice, the love interest. Their honest banter, their innocence, and most of all, their total commitment to each other as friends again and again strike emotional chords in the viewer; they're interesting, likable kids. 

The film's most brilliant scene, aesthetically, is unarguably the train crash and Joe's struggle to escape it; part Saving Private Ryan and part Jack Shephard from the pilot episode of LOST, we see one of the most moving, troubling disasters ever created. The feeling and experience of confused panic, often times solitary, is one that Abrams knows and knows well; it's one he consistently forces on his heroes (and his audiences). The explosions, the fire, the grinds and scrapes of metal on metal, and complete chaos of the crash scene are horrifying, and not unrealistic. Once the "creature" escapes and the film's focus shifts to it, there come some further wonderful (horrible) moments of both sight and sound: the sheriff lingers outside a gas station after pack of dogs chase by (something scary); a serviceman hovers in his truck's cherry picker as he attempts to fix some wiring (something scary); and Joe and Charlie see part of what their camera actually recorded the night of the crash (WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING?). The incomplete glimpses, the swells of orchestral score (original music by Michael Giacchino), and hearing the creature's noises before ever seeing it created exciting, suspenseful drama. 

One can't help wondering just how much of his own youth Abrams put into the story, Charlie's explanation of successful drama to Joe, constantly hollering, "production value!" each time something interesting happened in the film's background, repeated script changes, and so on. Whatever the history, it was beautiful, a remake of absolutely nothing, and a filmmaker's Valentine to film from start to finish. Bravo.

Give (Alien) Peace a Chance: I am Number Four

There is a lot of unnecessary hate out there for this film. Then again, teen movies aren't favorites with everyone. The dialogues are usually campy and (st)uttered by inexperienced players. The sexual tension gets old fast. The plot lines (virgin has relations with apple pie; vampire falls in love with uncoordinated tomboy; redheaded sophomore's birthday goes unnoticed; etc.) are far-fetched and sometimes silly. In this regard, D.J. Caruso's I Am Number Four  blends in perfectly, because on some level (and older viewers might do well to remember this) ALL TEEN FILMS ARE RIDICULOUS. So if you're okay with a little bit of ridiculousness, are able to appreciate the nostalgia of teen-dom, and enjoy science fiction, this film is for you. 

First off, don't be fooled by dismissive comparisons to The Twilight Saga; this film is actually nothing like Twilight except for the teenage characters and the sharpness of the enemies' teeth, but that's honestly reaching, a lot. If the film was influenced by anything, it was by the science fiction/thriller aspects of television shows like The Twilight Zone, The X-Files, and if I want to reach some more, evenLOST or The Matrix. The film opens with an unseen creature chasing a young man (Number Three) through a jungle. The star of the story, Number Four, has unnatural physical powers (legacies) that becomes stronger when his emotions flare. And throughout the film, verbal homages are paid, "You mean those 'truth is out there' freaks?" and "my entire childhood has been an episode of X-files." Even the title fits in on a very basic level among Twilight Zone writers' selections---Richard Matheson's I Am Legend and Charles Beaumont/John Tomerlin's Number Twelve Looks Just Like You.

This film works because of two things: the casting and the effects. The length (only 109 minutes) and the music didn't hurt, either. The entire production was extremely well cast, but topping the list were the two principals, Pettyfer and Agron. They both gave their characters an almost subtle, hesitant charm, choosing eye-rolls and smirks over stuttering or squinting (there were a few neck-clenches, however). The first kiss between them strikes a chord by providing the words every lovesick teenager wants to hear; "All I think about is you." Also well cast was Timothy Olyphant (Go, Deadwood, Justified), who, while a little young for a father figure role, is always a good business decision. His first scene shows him wonderfully shaggy-haired and in beach bum attire, looking very much like a version of LOST'S famed pilot, Frank Lapidus. Speaking of LOST, alum Kevin Durand (who plays the lead Mog) just can't get a break. If playing awful commando Martin Keamy wasn't a plague on his soon-to-be-typecast-as-a-disgusting-villain-for-the-rest-of-his-life house, then I don't know what is. All the sneering, inhaling, and delight in the causing of pain suit him perfectly; Durand is a legitimate fright. 

sick! 

The story is about Number Four (played by Alex Pettyfer), an alien from the planet Lorien living on Earth with his protector, Henri (played by Timothy Olyphant). Forced to leave their home because of enemy attacks, the two are on the lam from the Mogadorians or Mogs, who are searching for Four and the others like him (the first three have been destroyed already bringing Four's number up on the hit list). Henri tries to convince Four (or John, as he's called in public) to keep a low profile but Sarah (Glee's Dianna Agron), a blossoming young photographer catches his eye and things start to get difficult. Loriens mate for life, you see. Sarah used to date the star quarterback, who is a bully. The bullying happens mostly to a young underclassman who believes his father was carried off by aliens, which turns out to be correct. All this drama causes Four to often lose control of his powers and open a little kick-ass from time to time, allowing the Mogs and another mysterious number to easily track where he's hiding through web postings and Youtube. There come slightly awkward scenes. Explosions. And an extremely stylized ending (where Michael Bay's hand in production becomes evident), but you know something? It all works.

Yes.

In terms of the effects, everything flowed really well and was impressive. The Mogadorians looked scary, Four (and Six) could do cool tricks, and the Matrix-calibre end battle was well done. Yes, a lot of what happened was far-fetched and at times a little silly, but this picture was never meant to be an exercise in reality. If you ask me, the kids did just fine. Sequels? See you there.

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides

Not a total shipwreck, but almost.

Before you go to the theater, you should know that this installment of the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise is without a doubt, the weakest film in the series. You know the saying, “if it’s not broken, don’t fix it?” Well, whatever drama developed between Disney producers and director of all three previous Pirates films Gore Verbinski actually should have been fixed because Rob Marshall very nearly sank the ship (!!) with this one. The actors and a few of the effects were just barely enough to sufficiently patch through the film’s overall lacking and mediocrity.

The story, while credited to the original writers of the rest of the films (Ted Elliott, Terry Rossio) is decidedly unimpressive. Captain Jack Sparrow, still without a ship of his own, must accompany Edward Teach (otherwise known as Blackbeard) and his daughter, Angelica to the fountain of youth. Captain Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush), from the previous films, is headed there, also. There are reasons we’re supposed to care about this road trip, I suppose, Jack and Angelica had a thing years back, Blackbeard, despite being the most feared pirate on the seas, has just received a death prophecy---if he doesn’t reach the fountain, Barbossa will kill him--- and as a concept, the fountain of youth seems interesting enough, but really, the story is tired and takes ages to actually pick up. The dialogues were mostly flat and Penelope Cruz (as Angelica) while beautiful, was no substitute for Will Turner or even Elizabeth Swann; this story really suffered from a lack of any interesting civilians!

Regarding Blackbeard’s ship, The Queen Anne’s Revenge is actually one of the best things about the film; the physical look of it, the zombies that crewed it, and its special “abilities” (both under Blackbeard’s reign and the man who later captains it) were fun. Blackbeard as a villain didn’t feel quite scary enough though, especially not after considering Davey Jones, The Kraken, or Barbossa’s teeth from the previous films. You really can’t help thinking, If he’s such a terrifying pirate, why is he running? For my money, Ian McShane (Blackbeard) was a whole lot more menacing as Al Swearengen in Deadwood.

The filmmaking choices were not great, either. Many of the scenes went on way too long and despite being the shortestPirates film yet, it honestly felt like the longest. It seemed like the majority of the film’s first half was composed of extreme close ups, which served as speed bumps to already-choppy sequences; the only one that made any sort of sense, continutity-wise was a close shot of Jack’s loaded grimace when he is told he’s aboard The Queen Anne’s Revenge.

The fountain itself is exciting, and a well-done setting, but by the time they actually reach it, feels like a giant letdown since we see it intact for only moments. The film wraps up by doing something one of my professors called “ending six times,” yet still leaving the door wide open for the next installment. (Which let’s pray is given back to Verbinski.)